Hodge Podge

I really failed at December.

We have been sick here a lot lately.

I loathe cleaning the microwave.

I mailed out most of our Christmas cards today. I sent only the picture card. I am really disappointed in myself. I even had a start on a letter. I am such a dork! Maybe I will post it on here sometime.

Ashley was in the hospital for chest pains. He has pneumonia and has to go back for a really comprehensive stress test on the 29th. I am trying not to feel like my cooking caused this. I would rather blame all the pop he drinks and the corndogs he eats at work.

I am not feeling Christmasish. Not sure what the deal is.

My house has not felt really clean or under control since before Thanksgiving.

I have been having trouble sleeping lately which is so not like me. Usually once I get to go to sleep, I sleep until a child or an alarm wake me.

I don't like to wrap presents. Jonathan helped me with some so that made it more fun. How that child loves tape!

I made eight batches of fudge for Ashley for work. Sadly I consumed way too much in my little tastes here and there. Perhaps that explains the stomach ache! Jonathan wondered why I was "wasting" all the fudge and giving it away.

Eli sat up today. Not for long but he did it. I think babies look so cute sitting up.

Jonathan actually said today as I was getting Elijah ready for bed, "but I didnt get to talk to him much today." Jonathan was sick today so pretty much out. He has made such a huge HUGE change in his attitude and actions towards Elijah. I am so so so so thankful. A miracle in my mind!!

One of Jonathan's presents and a couple of Ashley's will not be here before we leave for Kansas. I did not do well with gifts this year. Elijah only has one and it is a CD. That was mainly a conscious decision. He needs nothing and will not realize he is not getting any thing. But there are a lot of things that would be fun to give him!

Our dog ate one of Ashley presents. Literally. I was so mad! I made a calendar for him on shutterfly. That is just as creative as I get. I was pretty excited about it and thought Ashley would enjoy having pictures of the boys at work. We got home the other evening and I noticed a part of a shutterfly box in the carport. I got a sinking feeling right away. Ashley found the calendar out in the yard. Of course it was also raining. So now he has seen the calendar, splattered with mud and rain and with one corner totally chewed off and several other teeth marks. I cleaned it up best I could and wrapped it anyway! All of the pictures are still good.

I miss my Grandma. Christmas time holds many wonderful memories of her.

14

Things about Elijah:

1. He pulls my hair. A lot!
2. I love when he lays his head on my shoulder. I am hoping he will be a snuggler.
3. He has a fascination with ceiling fans and overhead lights.
4. He is quite ticklish. Ashley found a new spot today and he just laughed and laughed. He will often giggle when I am changing his clothes.
5. The changing table is a happy place for him. He babbles away and smiles and laughes.
6. Rolling down the windows in the car is a go to move he likes. If paci, music or talking is not working, we try the windows.
7. He likes to be outside. He gets quiet and just looks around.
8. He likes his bouncy seat. For this I am very thankful. This helps soooo much with getting dishes done or a shower taken. Some sort of chewable object must be provided for the bouncy seat to last long.
9. He likes music. If he is teetering on the edge and I start singing, he will quiet down. Bless his heart!! The other morning I was singing Arky Arky and Alice the Camel for him as I got ready. I am horrible at recalling songs.
10. He has been rolling over for awhile now but it still seems to surprise him each time.
11. I love when he touches my face.
12. I have no idea what color his hair is or will be.
13. God has shown me love through this precious child so sweetly.
14. He is deeply, deeply loved.

15

Things about Jonathan:
1. He likes a reaction. He gets this from his daddy!
2. He often will pick the lint or whatever it is from between his toes. This often happens when he is supposed to be getting ready for bed. For some reason I find it endearing.
3. He did most of the decorating of our tree. While it will not win any Martha Stewart awards, it is quite pretty. He had the fun idea of using the cotton he picked this fall to put on the tree to look like snow. It really looks quite neat!
4. He places no pride in fashion.
5. He will do or do without most anything for ice cream. He is not picky on flavor. He more goes for quanity!
6. He has a little trouble with his "R" sound. When he says "more" you can tell and I noticed it today when I heared him say "sir." I wonder if this is something he will outgrow.
7. For him to feel truly listened to, you must look at him. Ashley is the same way. Most stories involve some sort of visual reenactment or drawing.
8. He is not a morning person. Not at all!
9. He has a friend at school named Samuel. I ate lunch with them today and it was so great to see them laughing and playing and Jonathan being so real and relaxed. I think I heard Samuel call him Johnny.
10. He loves to tie knots. We found some string on the sidewalk today and it totally turned around an ulgy attitude (if I were making a gratitude list, that rope would make the list!). He found all kinds of things to do with the rope, including tug of war with me. He is not so great at getting the knots out. I have spent quite a bit of time doing this!!
11. He is totally learning to interact with his little brother. Today he said "I got him" when Elijah started to squak a bit when he woke up from a nap. He likes to make him laugh.
12. He can make scrabbled eggs and brown hamburger. I am there supervising and helping but he truly does most of it.
13. He does this thing with his tongue when he is excited but a little nervous or shy.
14. He LOVES to wrestle with Daddy. He will give up books at night to get to do this.
15. He is deeply, deeply loved.

Just a picture

Too sweet not to share.

No list tonight. Not even sure what day I should be on. Hope to get better.

My heart has been heavy and my mind exhausted.

Great is His faithfulness. His mercies are new every morning. Clinging to this.

Thank you Lord for loving me.

22

Things I did do today:
1. Laundry
2. Unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher.
3. Washed sheets and actually got them back on the bed before last minute at bed time.
4. Changed three dirty diapers very happily. Elijah has been a little constipated so I was quite happy for him. Even in the middle of the night!
5. Sustained life (thought this sounded a little more exciting than nursed a baby!!)
6. Read to Jonathan
7. Watched Jonathan WILLINGLY, totally of his own iniciative entertain Elijah!!!!!!!!! This was a monumental, store in my heart moment. it acutally happened several times. Eli started fussing and Jonathan went to him and growled at him and jumped around. He can make Elijah laugh more than either Ashley or I. I was so proud of him today. He said his name rather than just baby. he willingly touched him. Thank You, Thank You Lord.
8. Bought a Christmas tree. Live and it smells so good.
9. Flaked off dried milk from behind Elijah's ears. Lovely huh!
10. Found the Christmas gift that Jonathan has been asking for!!!! He has asked for a helicopter like his cousin Caleb has. He loves the hook it has on it. If this child can hook and tow things with a toy, he is happy! I had found several helicopters last week but none with hooks. Today I found it!!
11. Got a shower. even shaved. and then ran out of hot water!
12. Fought hard to take captive my thoughts and focus on what is excellent and praiseworthy and not let bitterness or what if or why not take over. Some moments were successful. some not so much.
13. Started to clean out several moldy items from the back of the fridge. Got interrupted.
14. Laughed out loud.
15. Craved chips and queso. This has actually been going on for a while. There is just no redeeming nutritional value in this but oh it is yummy!
16. Remembered again that we have Krispy Kreme doughnuts in our freezer. So far untouched! and they need to remain that way first of all because they are designated for something but also because once opened, the trouble starts.
17. Watered the plants. Several were looking quite droopy so it was time.
18. Have some anxiety over a box of Christmas decorations we have not found. My grandma gave us an ornament every year that she made. I will be so sad if we can not find them.
19. Snuck a handful of chocolate chips when Jonathan was not in the kitchen. It was a small handful. But actually I did it twice!
20. Was so thankful for "paci!" Even the pink and purple one my sisters gave us before we knew Elijah was Elijah. It is his at home paci. He doesnt care!!
21. Kissed my sweet boys. all of them.
22. Sang Christmas songs.

23

Things I should be doing:
1. Dishes
2. Laundry
3. Vaccuming
4. Finishing Christmas decorating
5. Working on Christmas cards
6. Working on thank you cards
7. Catching up on email correspondance
8. Planning next weeks menu
9. Finding the source of a nasty smell in the laundry room area. Not sure I really want to know. But very sure I want the smell gone.
10. Changing the batteries on the smoke alarm. The beeping is about to drive me bonkers!
11. Working on a Christmas gift for Ashley
12. Sending some pictures to my sister that she asked for quite a while ago.
13. Doing my quiet time that has not happened today yet.
14. Exercising. This has not happened today yet either. or yesterday. or any time of any consistency lately.
15. Washing diapers.
16. Putting my summer clothes away.
17. Taking out my overly dry contacts.
18. Doing some paperwork for Ashley.
19. Dusting.
20. Going through a pile of mail, Jonathan school stuff, magazines, random items that need to be dealt with. I at least collected it all from various places around the house.
21. Figuring out a birthday gift for a friend.
22. Making final decisions on Christmast gifts for different people.
23. Sleeping!!

24

I have to add two more to the Kansas list:
Six days without cloth diapers!!
My sweet niece Anna Jo asked if I wanted to be "besties" with her and her mommy. Anna has such a servant heart. She is an incredible little girl. And she loves snacks too! I totally smiled when I heard her telling her daddy about going shopping with the girls on Friday. She started off by telling him what all we had to eat! Polly says I do that about experiences too.

Yesterday belonged to Kansas so on this 24th day until Christmas, I am going to find 24 things I like about Tennessee right now. I know I can do it!

1. Elijah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sweet Eli is a TN native so for this alone TN will always be special to me.
2. Less wind. Ahhh less wind. Sunday in Kansas was absolutely crazy.
3. Gorgeous leaves
4. Cotton fields, cotton gins, cotton smell, cotton pickers, cotton farmers
5. Elijah sleeping better again!
6. A good washer and dryer
7. A dish washer that works
8. Pepper, our sweet, loyal dog
9. Elijah's doctor. I really struggled with having to leave Dr. Marla. We all loved her. and trusted her. Dr. Amy is no Dr. Marla but she and I have similiar view points, she is positive and encouraging and she likes Elijah.
10. I don't actual like this but I need this. Being forced to face some fears.
11. Mrs. Ashlee, Jonathan's teacher. I nearly cried the other day when I realized she will not be his teacher his whole life! God has given me such comfort through this woman. He hand picked her I truly believe. She likes to shoot guns;she drives a jeep with big tires, she speaks his love language with candy incentives, her husband operates an excavator; she listens to his stories; he tells her his stories; her name is Ashlee. Could there be a better fit??!!
12. The accent. Most of them, most of the time. The other day I was in an ugly mood and even the accent here was irritating me!
13. The library. They have several seasons of Little House on the Prairie. Jonathan is working his way through them! And they have good selection on books.
14. Our TV. Ashley's dad has a really big TV, which we now have. The thing I like is we get, literally, two channels! Two. Cracks me up!
15. Our 4-wheelers. We all really enjoy riding around and exploring.
16. The many gun carrying, loud, tall truck driving, patriotic, hardworking men here. that sounds bad, it is not the men but the way Ashley fits here. It explains a lot about him. Bless his heart coming to my world.
17. Lori. She loves my family. She loves her family deeply. She is real. She looks out for Jonathan at school. She texted us several times on his first day of school to let us know how he was doing. That meant so very much. Her strength is based in Christ.
18. Caramel pie. A recipe we learned from a friend here. Really quite simply and sinfully delicious. I will make it for anyone who comes to visit. It is worth the drive!! :)
19. My Jeep. I really do love it!
20. Our pond. Ashley and Jonathan get a lot of delight out of it.
21. All of my family has been to visit.
22. Ashley seems to enjoy his work here and exploring new ideas and dreams.
23. Our shooting range. It really is quite cool.
24. God is here too.

25 days

I am really not creative. I wanted to come up with something fun to write about in December. The most creative I got was thinking about the 12 days of Christmas. So I am going to make it in to the 25 days of Christmas and write something around the number of each day.
Since it took all my creative work to borrow this idea, I am going to revert back to November and write about the 25 things I am thankful for from our trip to Kansas

1. Safe arrivals there and back.
2. Mashed potatoes!! Mom makes the best. This could make the list several times.
3. Not having to decide meals for six days. I did help with cooking. Or actually I started numerous different things and then someone else would have to take over as Elijah needed something. It was fun to cook with my mom and sisters.
4. Watching Elijah snuggle with Mom when she went to get him from a nap on Sat.
5. Surviving picture taking of all the cousins. We started taking a picture each year of all the grandkids for my parents and for us several years ago. Each year a baby has been added and then anxiety about the picture seems to have risen also. Considering eight kids seven and younger including a 4 month old and two toddlers were involved and one sweet girl threw up on the way, the event went okay. I still have not seen the final results, but it is done for another year. And if it isnt perfect, it probably is just all the more realistic of the kiddos.
6. Elijah being super cute when we first arrived at Mom and Dad's. Mom and Polly were still awake and Elijah smiled and babbled away. I loved it! And then he still went to sleep really well. that might be my favorite part of the memory! :) The next couple nights would not make any thankful list!!
7. Seeing my niece Cammi literally bounce up and down in happiness at seeing Grammy. Mom has a really sweet relationship with Nikki's children. Cammi did her bounce a couple times at seeing Elijah. She is a sweetie.
8. Polly highlighted my hair. She is so sweet to give up time and sleep to often cut our hair when we see her. I am still adjusting to the hair but so far people have been kind about it and Ashley likes it which was the point.
9. Mom gave me a hen and chick plant. This plant reminds me of my sweet Grandma.
10. Going to church at Garden and seeing precious friends. It felt good to be there. Did make me miss that church even more though. and the people.
11. My sisters had hand-me-downs for both boys. Some were perfect size and season for now. Such a blessing!
12. Ashley made room in a very packed car to fit in the clothes and plant and other "necessary" things to bring back. With very very little complaining!!!
13. Playing nertz, a card game, with my cousins. Nikki and I held our own pretty well against some very competitive players.
14. Jonathan playing with his cousins.
15. Watching my oldest nephew Corbin play with and talk to Elijah in the car. All my nieces and nephews are super sweet to Elijah and want to hold him. Not sure what I am doing wrong with Jonathan.
16. Polly's homemade rolls, her pumpkin roll, Mom's corn dip, and cinnamon rolls.
17. Getting to see Matthew and Sherlynn. I have such deep respect for these two people. They are so thoughtful and fun.
18. Fairly successful black Friday shopping. Elijah did quite a good job.
19. Getting to have Jonathan sleep with us. This is always a treat for him and for us when we are traveling. It does get a little crowded but it is special to watch him sleep. Not sure how it works with multiple children!
20. A husband who is patient and supportive about longer stops while traveling because of nursing.
21. Dad keeping a warm fire going.
22. Mom giving Jonathan some of his favorite BBQ sauce to bring back with us.
23. A calmer Saturday after a very busy few days. Even got a little time with just Mom.
24. Grammy and Papa spoiling Jonathan with ice cream. He counts on there being some in the freezer!
25. Feeling loved and like I belong.

Last one

November has ended. It has been good for me to do this. There were days it was very necessary to be forced to look for the good. And the good is always there. God is so very good!

1. Dishes done, laundry further along(putting everything away really does not count! that is a good activity to do with Eli.), grocery shopping done. No fresh fruit in the house bothers me so a late night trip to Walmart was in order.

2. Elijah's noises. He wakes up happy. this should make the thank you list every day. He is the only one in the family who does this. He will be cooing and babbling away first thing in the morning. Wow, thank You Lord!

3. Heat. It is cold here. I am so thankful for heat in the house. and yesterday our friend Zeb brought a heater to use in the office since that one is still not working right. It was so very uncomfortable in there. Ashley has a small heater in his actual office so Elijah was taken care of but the rest of the building was miserable. Every thing went better when there was some heat. Zeb was the hero of the day.

4. Cooking chili with Jonathan. he really likes to help. That is something we do well together. He even put on an apron yesterday. It soon became a cape and a lasso and who knows what else but he looked mighty cute in this yellow flowered apron from my Grandma.

5. People who have been so kind about reading and encouraging me on writing. it totally made my day when someone would say they enjoyed reading.

Welcome December.